Solo Parenting: Navigating the Journey Alone
Solo Parenting: Navigating the Journey Alone
Solo Parenting: Navigating the Journey Alone
Parenting is hard, no matter what the circumstances. But parenting alone — without a co-parent in the picture — creates a different kind of reality. One that can feel invisible, exhausting, and deeply lonely at times.
If you’re navigating the path of solo parenting, you already know there’s no manual for this. No set of rules that tells you how to keep the lights on, pay the bills, meet the emotional needs of a growing child, and still somehow find a sliver of space to breathe. And yet you do it. Day after day, night after night. Even when you are completely spent. Even when it feels like no one else really understands what it costs you to keep going.
I see you. And you are not alone, even if it often feels that way.
In my work with women navigating solo parenting, the same themes emerge again and again: exhaustion, resilience, grief, pride, anger, tenderness, and a longing for recognition that often goes unmet.
Today, I want to talk about what solo parenting really looks like, why it’s different from other forms of single parenting, and how you can stay connected to yourself in the midst of it.
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What is solo parenting?
At its core, solo parenting means raising a child without a consistent or reliable co-parent involved.
This might be because you chose to have a child on your own. It might be because your former partner is absent, whether emotionally, physically, financially, or all three.
It might be because your co-parent is not safe or stable enough to be present. Or it might be because of death, estrangement, incarceration, or other circumstances beyond your control.
Whatever the story, the bottom line is the same: when you are a solo parent, the full weight of parenting falls on you. There is no other parent to tag in when you are sick, overwhelmed, or simply need a break. There is no emotional safety net to share the worries and decisions with.
It’s you. Every day. Every choice. Every celebration. Every meltdown.
And while there can be great pride in that, it can also be incredibly isolating.
Solo parenting vs single parenting: what’s the difference?
These terms are often used interchangeably, but they are not the same.
Single parenting usually refers to anyone who is not married or partnered while raising a child. You may be divorced, separated, or never partnered with your child’s other parent. However, many single parents still share custody, decision-making, or financial support with a co-parent.
Solo parenting means you are doing it alone.
There is no shared custody. No weekends off. No child support deposits hitting your account. No second set of hands to call when the school nurse says your child has a fever. The emotional, financial, and logistical load is yours to carry, fully and without backup.
Both single and solo parents face enormous challenges, and both deserve support. But it is important to recognize that solo parenting carries an extra layer of exhaustion and invisibility that often goes unacknowledged.
If you have ever felt frustrated when well-meaning friends say, "I get it, I have my kids most of the time too," you are not crazy for feeling unseen.
There is a difference between being the primary parent and being the only parent.
The emotional weight of parenting alone
Solo parenting is not just about doing all the tasks — the school pickups, the sports practices, the bedtime routines, the homework battles. It is about carrying the emotional container of your child's world with no one to help share the weight.
You are the one who comforts after nightmares.
You are the one who celebrates the report card or the soccer goal.
You are the one who holds the disappointment of a missed birthday party or a lost friendship.
You are the one who disciplines, soothes, advocates, and worries.
There is no one else sitting next to you at night, processing the hard questions or reminding you that you are doing your best.
There is just you, trying to be enough for both yourself and your child. This emotional labor can be invisible to others, but it is profound.
It shapes your nervous system. It impacts your health. It weaves itself into every corner of your life. And it deserves to be named, seen, and honored.
Financial and logistical realities of solo parenting
The financial strain of solo parenting is also significant. Without a second income or financial support, you may find yourself constantly strategizing how to make ends meet. Childcare costs, medical bills, school supplies, summer camps, groceries — it all adds up fast.
There are fewer safety nets when you are on your own. If your child gets sick and you have to miss work, there is no co-parent to cover that lost income. If you want to pursue a new opportunity, travel, or even take a night off, the logistics are infinitely more complicated.
Even small things, like attending a late work meeting or scheduling a dentist appointment, require a level of juggling that people with a co-parent often do not realize.
This constant negotiation of time, money, and energy is draining. It is a kind of background noise that never fully turns off.
The loneliness of being the only adult in the room
One of the hardest parts of solo parenting is the loneliness.
Not just the loneliness of sleeping alone or making every decision by yourself, although those things matter. It is the loneliness of not having another adult who is equally invested in your child’s life. No one else is paying attention to the milestones or the daily dramas the way you are. No one else feels the stakes the way you do.
You might have family, friends, or a strong support network. But it is not the same as having a co-parent who shares the deepest layers of responsibility and attachment.
This loneliness can sneak up on you. It can be masked by busyness or buried under the to-do lists. But it is there, often pulsing just below the surface. And it deserves compassion, not shame.
Staying connected to yourself while solo parenting
When you are in survival mode, self-connection often feels like a luxury.
It can be hard to even remember what you want, what you feel, or what lights you up.
But staying connected to yourself is not just good for you. It is essential for your child. When you nurture your own emotional world, you model resilience, authenticity, and self-worth.
This does not mean adding more pressure to your already overflowing plate. It means small, doable acts of care that keep you tethered to your inner life.
Maybe it means finding ten minutes to journal before bed, even if the dishes are still in the sink. Maybe it means reaching out to a friend you trust and saying, “I just need to hear an adult voice today.”
Maybe it means carving out a monthly ritual that belongs just to you, whether it is a walk in nature, a therapy session, or an afternoon spent wandering a bookstore.
You are allowed to have needs. You are allowed to have dreams. You are allowed to exist as a full human being, not just as a parent.
Letting go of perfection
Solo parenting often brings out perfectionistic tendencies that might have been quieter before. When the stakes feel high and the margin for error seems razor-thin, it becomes easy to believe you have to do everything right, all the time. You might find yourself setting impossible standards, believing that if you just work hard enough, plan carefully enough, or anticipate every need, you can somehow make up for the absence of a co-parent.
The truth is, perfection is not required. Your child does not need a perfect parent. They need a parent who is real, present, and willing to show up even on the messy, exhausted days. They need someone who can apologize when emotions run high, who can model resilience not by doing everything flawlessly, but by showing them what it looks like to repair and move forward with care.
Letting go of perfection does not mean lowering your standards or giving up on being intentional. It means releasing the impossible pressure that keeps you disconnected from your own humanity. It means recognizing that good enough, when it is rooted in love and authenticity, is more than enough. Even on the days when you are stretched thin, even when doubt creeps in, your presence matters more than any polished version of parenting ever could.
If you’re curious about what it would look like to work together, you can schedule a free 30 minute discovery call.
You Are Doing Sacred Work
Solo parenting is relentless at times, and it can feel thankless in ways that few people truly understand. It demands energy you do not always have and strength you are forced to summon over and over again. But underneath all of that effort, there is something profoundly sacred happening.
You are building a world for your child, day after day, through your love, your perseverance, and your quiet acts of care that may go unnoticed by others but will be woven into the fabric of your child’s being. Every meal prepared, every story read at bedtime, every conversation where you show up even when you are exhausted — it all matters.
Your resilience deserves to be acknowledged. Your exhaustion deserves to be met with compassion, not judgment. And your heart deserves space to rest and be nourished too. You are not failing because this is hard. It is hard because it matters so deeply.
If you're ready for support
Solo parenting asks so much of you, often without offering much space to pause, grieve, or be held yourself. If you are starting to feel the weight of it all, if you are realizing that you cannot keep carrying everything alone, it might be time to reach out for support.
Working with someone who understands the emotional landscape of solo parenting can make an enormous difference. Whether it is learning how to reconnect with yourself, finding ways to soften the relentless pressure, or simply having a place where you do not have to explain why you are tired, the right kind of support can be a lifeline.
In my work, I hold space for women navigating the complex realities of parenting alone. Together, we untangle the guilt, the anger, the grief, and the fierce love that are often all tangled together. We work slowly and honestly, making room for your full humanity — not just the parts that are surviving, but the parts that are ready to feel alive again too.
If you feel ready, you are invited to schedule a free consultation. There is no pressure, no expectation, only a place to be seen and supported for exactly where you are right now.
You were never meant to do all of this without someone walking alongside you. And you do not have to anymore.
